Going, Going, Gone

This afternoon I was given notice that as of Wednesday at 4 pm I will be laid off from my part-time, on-going, contract job. This is with a company that I have worked with since 1998 in various capacities. For those who do not know, I am a freelance/contract writer for this company and others as the need arises. I do anything from press releases, website copy, media kits, magazine or newsletter articles, product bulletins, and sales kits to media relations and speech writing. Basically if it needs written I do it.

All contract employees for my division have been laid off. This decision is final and they cannot say the longevity of this. I do not work full time and we do not depend on any money that I make to survive. I work from home, make my own schedule and am able to stay home with the kids. Frankly, I have been very blessed. I cannot imagine what some of the others given this news are feeling. Frankly I think it is pretty sad that they have been given a 2 days notice, especially right before Christmas. While I can understand with the tough economic situation our country is in, it still just isn't fair.

To be honest, for me it is a pride issue. When I give so much to my kids and to my husband, this is the one thing that is mine and mine alone. And right now when I feel like I am giving so much to everyone else, this was the one constant thing I have that is just "mine". It did make me feel better that one of my co-workers not affected by the layoff called this afternoon and told me how much he enjoyed working with me, how sorry he was and how I am on the top of the list when/if they are able to bring people back. He said it is always sad when good people are let go for reasons beyond their control.

It is not often that I have a pity party for myself, but I have been parenting 3 kids for the past 2 months alone, I am moving 7,412 miles away, I haven't seen my husband in 2 months, all my belongs will be packed and on a boat starting Thursday not to be seen for 6 - 8 weeks, my kids are grating on each other and myself, my oldest child hates me on most days, Sami hasn't slept through the night in months, I still have a huge list of things to do and pack before Thursday, 3 of my close friends are going through things that are breaking my heart and it hurts that I will not be here to hold their hand, I am not near ready for Christmas, I miss my daughter even more during the holidays, frankly I am tired and now I have been laid off. I think I am entitled to have a pity party for just a few minutes. But I promise it will be just a few minutes. I know that God has a plan, and I know that the plan will be great. Maybe I will get that book written after all.

So to those who have been affected by this downturned economy my heart goes out to you. For those who received bad news today my heart breaks for you. I pray this recession is short-lived and that our nation will soon be on its way to being even better than before.